fluWith my face buried in my pajamas, so as not to spread germs, I coughed with such force that I could barely catch my breath.  When this flu-fueled coughing jag ended, I was able to raise my head and inhale. I quietly muttered to myself, “I feel like I’m going to die.”


Then I looked over at my 4-year-old’s face.

She looked so frightened.

“What did you say Mommy?”she asked nervously.

“Oh, what I meant was, ‘I feel really, really sick.”

My 4-year-old doesn’t grasp the concept of death yet. All she knows is that it’s not good (“Mommy, that bird diiiiiiiiiied!). Fortunately, she sort-of gets the concept of “sayings.” My comment about an American Idol contestant who “looks like he has a load in his pants” seemed to resonate well with her. Can’t wait till she spontaneously shares that one with her preschool class …

I can’t be held accountable for my poor word choice on that cough-filled morning because I was (and as I write this, continue to be) under the influence of influenza.

How did I get sick? I never get sick! I’ve always refused to get flu shots because I am so cocky about my superior immune system. But the odds caught up with me, and it ain’t pretty.

This week, I have felt sicker than I have EVER felt. Even after that night of wine, beer, champagne, vodka and whiskey at my husband’s best friend’s wedding. (also, not pretty).

This bug has really kicked me in the pants, so I’m going to hit the sack. Then I’ll start thinking of better child-friendly sayings to express my emotions. How’s “I feel like I’m going to cough up a lung?”